Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Drama!!! (I HATE GOODBYES!!!)

Goodbye: Self Portrait

So my husband has finally had to submit to the inevitable-he left today for Texas as an Over The Road (OTR) driver. We have tried so hard to avoid this for the past few years, but it finally happened. He will be gone for 21 days, home for 4, and that will be his long-term schedule. I am heartbroken but I know he is trying to be a good provider and I really respect him for it. So I will probably be on the message boards more often now, to fight loneliness, etc!

Always Trying to Make Me Laugh.

Our foster son is also leaving, on thursday, so I will truly be living alone for the first time in 8 years. Wow! I am totally freaked out. I am sure that I will get used to it, but it will take me some time.

If you see a big orange Schneider Truck out there on the Highways of the USA, give a wave because it could very well be my dear darling Bubby.

This is where he will sleep.
This morning before he left, I wrote the following:
Life can change so fast. Was this course of changes inevitable, or did we cause it to be? A year ago we were so happy, everything was fine. Now we will be separated for so much of the time. How can we possibly stay close and in love? I feel responsible somehow. Was it scrapbooking? Or my failure to get a good job, which may or may not have really been my fault? I don’t think it is Jesse’s fault, his job didn’t give him enough hours and he was really sick of dump trucking anyway, and there haven’t been any other open doors except this one. So does that mean that everything will be ok? I worry the most for Jesse, his health, his happiness, his spirituality. Will he take care of himself without me around? I must commit to pray for him constantly. I really feel how much I love this man now that he is leaving me alone for 3 weeks.


tigardlilly said...

I'm sorry Jesse will be away so long, but you 'll make it though; I know you will! Make sure you call me if you need anthing.

Scrap Evangel said...

May the Lord keep you both in perfect peace and safety while you are apart. In Jesus name. Amen!

Marilyn said...

I know this must be hard. I am here for you if you ever need to talk, get out of the house, a shoulder to cry on, or whatever. Call me!

Marfa said...

You know that saying: "Absense makes the heart grow fonder"? Remember that, you'll be SO happy to have him home.
Rob was deployed to Iraq twice, gone for months....it was difficult for both of us.
My dad was an OTR truck driver, for many years. It's a good life, lots of time while you're driving to think about life in general and thank God for your blessings....and a sweet wife to come HOME to!

Kay said...

I wish it didn't have to come to this. Being apart just sucks plain and simple. I will be praying for both of you! Please call or email me when ever you need to.

Tana said...

Christina I'm so sorry. I will be praying for you guys.
Why don't you come for dinner soon?? John is staring a class next week through July. He will be gone every Mon and Wed!

HapEMomE said...

Ahh, I am sorry girl. You'll be in my prayers. May God give you the strength to get through these days. I'll be thinking of you. You guys are so cute...you always have the cutest pictures of you guys. :)

joscelyne cutchens said...

I am sorry that this is going to be his long term schedule! that's tough. I will pray for you and your comfort (hugs)

Pamela said...

Wow..that is rough, but sometimes God does things that we just don't understand (ok...most of the time) but there is a reason and He has a plan! Good will come of this! And in the meantime, you and your family are in my prayers...and I look forward to seeing more of you on the mb. :) Take care.

Theresa Tyree said...

Awww, babe. I'm so sorry your beloved will be away so much of the time. That's gotta be so hard on you. I will pray that a new door will open for Jesse and he can be home more. I had to send my son away to Texas to live with his father. You can do like I did. I got a puppy so I wouldn't miss my son so much. Of course nothing can replace my son, but my mind is preoccupied with the puppy now.

Hugs, to you, honey.