Sunday, June 15, 2008

I'm in a funk...

I've taken a break from scrapping this week due to trying to make some necklaces to sell for, you guessed it-more scrapbooking cash! I am kind of feeling melancholy though, since I've been looking around at tons and tons of online blogs, galleries etc. There is so much talent out there, sometimes I feel like I should just give up since I feel like I'll never be as good as some people out there. I try to remind myself that I only started scrapping a year and a half ago, so it's ok to still be pretty new and amateur at this. And I know some people will just be baffled since we're supposed to be scrapping our memories and that is all that matters. Well, I have to confess that I am barren, and my life is blissfully boring sans children, so I am really scrapping for art's sake only. I'm not going to sugarcoat it. I am an artist in other mediums as well-beading, painting, drawing, pottery, embroidery, knitting...the list goes on. If I didn't have my art I think I might die of sadness because I can't have a baby. So this is my scatterbrained mini-rant and a peek into my true heart. I probably shouldn't post this online for the entire planet to see, but I guess I'm kind of wondering if anyone else feels any of these things???

9 comments:

Willea said...

First, thanks for your sweet comments in my blog!

I kind of know what you mean, it´s hard not to compare yourself with others when you see so many talanted people doing the one more beautiful thing after the other. I must say that I think you have sooooo much talent! You make gorgeous layouts, girl, and you have a unique style (which I think I lack...)

I´m sorry that you can´t have a baby - sending you a BIG cyberhug.

Love, Willea

Marilyn said...

Christina, Whatever you do, DO NOT GIVE UP on your scrapping! You do have a wonderful talent-you definately have your own style. It is beautiful, timeless, elegant, and full of love. You make such wonderful pages that really tell a story. I know how you feel, I have felt the same way and wanted to give up, for a lot of the same reasons too! It is very hard to scrap when everyone else is scrappin thier kids. I also know how frustrating it is to not be able to get all the new stuff. You did hit it on the head when you said you scrap for you-there is nothing wrong with that. I do the same thing. I scrap for my own enjoyment and the art of it. Most my family don't care about it anyway, they think it is a waste of time/money! HAH, what do they know?! Personally, if I didn't have my scrappin, what would I do with my time? Because of scrappin, I no longer need to take pills to make me happy. Don't give up, you enjoy it so much and you have a supportive husband. I wish you luck with the jewelry making, you make gorgous stuff in that craft as well. You can do both, or even integrate them together! I hope you decide to keep on with it, because I have seen you scrappin, and you DO enjoy it. Love ya, Marilyn

TanishaRenee said...

There is absolutely nothing wrong with scrapping just for the pure art or scrapping for You- children or not! Don't give up, do not give up- this is probably just a phase that you will get through and when you do, you'll be creating like mad!

Loved the honesty of your journaling, btw.

Scrap Evangel said...

Please don't worry yourself with comparisons. Scrap whatever you think looks pretty and what makes you happy. It's your own art expression and no one can do that better than you! Scrap, create and have fun!

Theresa Tyree said...

Chris, I think all of us get in a scrappy funk once in a while. It's funny you should say that because I posted the same thing on my blog a few posts back, so there's proof that it happens to us all!!
Don't try to measure yourself against others. We're all individuals with our own expressions- each one unique! Nobody else in this world can do what you do, so be proud of who you are and what you can make with your blessed hands!

Being barren is a blessing in disguise. I'm so glad my parents were barren otherwise I wouldn't be living the life I'm living today. A dear friend of mine (her blog is linked to mine- Coover family) just adopted a baby boy from Russia. There is a child out there who needs you. Contact Melissa Coover and she can give you some details. We prayed for her and within a year, she became a mom. I will be praying your blessing comes soon. God is the owner of the cattle of a thousand hills. He is your Father. He loves you and will give you the desires of your heart and will make a way, according to his will and purpose.

Jules said...

I absolutely get where you are coming from, dear and I've been at this craft for over twelve years. Don't ever feel you are a failure and please please don't stop scrapping. I love to look at your creations!

Kimberly said...

I think everyone has felt this way-I do all the time. You seriously have a LOT of talent. I know what it feels like to want more and to feel set apart-but it sends me running back to the Lord's arms. He chose you. He set you apart. He ordained your days before time began! He dreams bigger for you than you can ever imagine!!
((HUGS)) and hang in there.

Samantha said...

I'm so sorry to read that you are sad and in a funk. I haven't been feeling very scrappy myself lately for many different reasons. We all feel this way sometimes, and it's okay to have these emotions. I hope you start feeling better soon. HUGS!

Christina C. said...

oh sweetie. thank you for being brave enough to share this.
I've hit that wall too and it's a sucky place to be. don't ever give up something if you love it. I hope you get outta the funk zone soon!